Deflection

Sarah reread the email for the third time, nibbling lightly on her lower lip.

"Have you ever used or wanted to use those methods on me?"

It was a simple question, and one which shouldn't have had her gnawing on her own lip, and finger nails, and pencil, and everything else within reach. And yet, she was suddenly overcome with confusion.

The question had been asked by Nate - her friend, confidante, and last-semester psychology professor. And it was in regards to deflection methods. Perhaps because of Sarah's drug addicted mother, or alcoholic father who loved visiting her room at night, or maybe it was because of the trading an hour with Sarah for drugs that her parents often found a workable deal with their friends... whatever it was, Sarah grew up knowing better than to let anyone get close to her. Even though she was removed from the home when she was fourteen, and ended up in a loving, wonderful home, the scars were still there, as were the lessons learned.

Nate had immediately found the young woman intriguing. She was witty and fun, dark and twisted, loving and sensitive, but always guarded. While they hadn't known each other long, Sarah had found herself being able to open up to Nate about her past, and what she'd been through. He was deeply religious, and philosophical, and of course, loved to break things down on a psychological level as well. Any one of these would have had Sarah running in the opposite direction had it been anyone else.

Although she was no longer his student, Nate loved to have deep conversations with her. Unfortunately, because of their schedules, the chance to have these conversations were few and far between. So, they would write lengthy emails back and forth. The latest conversation  between the two of them was centered on Sarah, and her subconscious ability to deflect. She had written him all the ways she kept people at bay, including acting dark and twisted to frighten people away; seducing men to avoid them getting close to her emotionally, and a few others.

"Have you ever used or wanted to use those methods on me?"

Sarah thought back to all the times she'd watched him in class, and would have to cross her arms over her chest to hide the evident tightening. All the times she would sit in his office, discussing something deep and meaningful, and she'd miss most of what he said because she was staring at his scruffy cheeks, his dark eyes, and his very kissable lips. All the times he'd hug her for comfort and she had wanted to press her hips against him. But, she never really pursued anything with him. He had a fiancee, plus had such strong religious beliefs. She respected that and therefore never gave a physical relationship with him another thought. Well, no other thoughts other than wishing he'd push her up against a wall and kiss her until her legs got weak.

She contemplated lying to him and saying "Nope, never even thought of it", but she had never lied to him. She wasn't about to start now. So, she started typing.

"I haven't a clue," she hammered onto the keyboard. "I will admit I have had a desire to kiss you, and touch you, but I don't know if it's me trying to keep you emotionally distant, or because I do want to be with you.."

After sending the email, Sarah took a long shower, allowing the water to soothe her confused mind. His question still bothered her. She truly didn't know the answer to his question, other than what she sent him for a response. She stood under the stream for so long, the water was beginning to cool.  Just as she climbed out of the shower, she heard a knock on her front door. Grabbing a fluffy short robe from the back of the bathroom door, she quickly tied the belt and opened the door.

"Nate!" Her face grew flushed. Though happy to see him, the earlier email was still weighing heavily on her mind.

Nate smiled, entering the room and closing the door behind him. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

"Not at all. Just got done with a shower, and was contemplating sitting around and watching a movie, or wasting my life away on my computer." Nate chuckled, knowing Sarah had a slight addiction to her computer. "Did you need something?"

Nate hesitated for a moment, looking deeply at Sarah. After a few moments, he moved his hands to the sleeves of the soft, plush robe. Gazing softly and intently into her baby blue eyes, he leaned in close, covering her lips with his own in a hesitant kiss. A slight moan from Sarah prompted him to tease her lips until they parted, allowing him to explore her mouth. He darted his tongue against hers, his hands slipping around behind her back, pulling her closer at the same time she leaned into hims.

Sarah felt like she was in heaven. She had no control over her body as it pressed up tight against him. She whimpered into his kiss, her tongue dancing with his. Her fingers slid under his sweater, dancing over his stomach and chest, then moving to entwine themselves in his hair, pulling him tighter to her lips.

Reality slowly set in. Nate pulled back slowly, still holding her in his arms. They both took shaky breaths. As Sarah's mind started to clear, she looked up questioningly at Nate.

Nate knew she was curious why he kissed her - would want to know what was going on. He tenderly brushed his fingers over her cheek.

"So...are you trying to keep me emotionally distant, or do you really want to be with me?"

Psychiatrist

Zin fidgeted in the chair, brushing her long red curls behind her ear, then moving her fingers to her mouth, nibbling on her finger nails. She had to be insane to have agreed to this meeting. She hated places like this. Her eyes wandered to the somewhat boring white walls. A couple small paintings of peaceful surroundings, a clock, and a few plaques displaying credentials were all decorated the white. The furniture was practical - a bookshelf, a desk, a couple chairs - nothing too spectacular.

"Wow, you look incredibly uncomfortable."

Zin looked up at the only other person in the room. "No, I'm..." she stumbled, trying to appear a bit less like she wanted to jump out the nearest window. "I'm sorry, Ben... Doctor Brunner... I'm just not..."

"Comfortable?"

Zin smiled nervously at Ben's help. "Right."

Ben reached over and patted Zin's knee, then quickly pulled back. "So, what can I do for you?"

"Um, well, you asked me to come..."

"Yes, because I thought you could use some help. You've been going through a lot more than most people can handle..."

"And thought I needed a shrink?"

Now it was Ben's turn to smile at Zin's help. "A friend," he corrected.

"You've always been a friend, Ben. Why did you insist on here this time?"

The slightly older man took a deep breath, leaning forward in his chair, his elbows resting on his legs - his chin resting on his knuckles. "I'm sorry if I'm pushing, or crossing a line here, Zin. But I just want to be here for you if you need it. We can go somewhere else if you'd be more comfortable?"

"No, this is fine. I'd be just as uncomfortable anywhere," she admitted.

"Ok," Ben hesitated, watching her face. Her blue eyes were cloudy, mixed with a myriad of emotions he could only guess at. But her fear and nervousness were shining through quite well. "How are you doing, really?"

"I'm... Ok..." she gave a bit of a laugh, "more or less." She glanced up at him again, finding it difficult to maintain eye contact. She shivered slightly, wringing her hands together.

It was almost painful for Ben to watch. Although they hadn't known each other for a long time, he did consider her a friend - or, at least, a pleasant acquaintance. They ran into each other quite often - she worked at the print shop a block from his office where he worked as a psychiatrist. Midway between their places of work stood a coffee shop they both frequented - which is where they often ran into each other, and would sit together and talk. Most of these conversations were conversations regarding psychology, or psychosis, or other somewhat deep conversations. But, they steered clear of too much small talk - neither found discussing the weather all that exciting or necessary. And they steered clear of personal discussions - Zin wasn't one to just start discussing her issues or believes or fears with anyone.

He started to reach out again, wanting to calm her nerves, but pulled back. Finally, after a few questions intended to direct her to spill what she was thinking, she let it out, explaining the depression of losing their beloved cat a month ago, followed by her sister's heart attack; and then explained her lack of extreme sorrow she was feeling about her husband's death a couple weeks' earlier. Ben pressed a bit to get more information regarding the husband, but stopped as he sensed Zin starting to clam up again, the shutters closing in her gaze. Obviously, there had been serious issues in the marriage - a suspicion he had felt months ago when he would see her come in for coffee with a bruise on her cheek, or around her wrists.

This time he did reach out, placing his hands over hers, which were still wringing in nervousness. His action caused Zin to look up into his deep brown eyes. Her own eyes were brimming with unshed tears, and as he lightly squeezed her fingers, she let the tears fall. They sat quietly until she had no more tears to cry. Her head was down, watching her hands, still held in his. He brought one hand to her chin, lifting her head to look at him. They gazed into each others eyes for a long moment.

Zin slowly moved closer to him until their lips met hesitantly. Ben's fingers slid from her chin to cradle her cheek, as his lips moved over hers lightly and without demand. Zin murmured softly against his lips, moving her hands to his knees, slowly sliding them up his thighs. His control lessening, Ben kissed her harder, coaxing her lips apart so he could slip his tongue into the warmth. His hands mimicked her actions, slipping up her bare legs, sneaking under the black skirt she wore.

She knew this was wrong, but at the same time found her desire heightened at the thought of being with her psychiatrist. If this wasn't an indication she needed help, she thought, then nothing would. She almost grinned against his kiss at the thought, but then felt his fingers getting closer to her desire. All thought left her mind, and she found herself reacting solely by her need. She scooted forward on her chair, moving closer to him, her own hands sliding up to connect lightly with his hard desire.

Ben groaned again as she touched him. His erection was straining against the seems of his jeans, his discomfort growing. As if sensing this, Zin quickly undid his jeans, slipping her fingers inside the denim. Her fingertips lightly brushed over the head, and he jerked, staring hotly into her eyes. She bit her bottom lip, smirking as she brushed over the head again, teasing. Ben brought his hand to the back of her neck, his fingers tangling into her hair, and pulled her to him, kissing her roughly at the same time he thrust a finger into her hot, wet need.

Zin cried out against his kiss, bucking against his hand, wanting more. She quickly pulled his hard cock out from his jeans, wrapping her fingers around the extensive width and stroking. Ben slid his hands under Zin's rear, and Zin whimpered, not wanting the exploration to stop. Ben kissed her again as he pulled her onto his lap, slipping his cock inside her fast and hard. She cried out again at the sudden invasion. Realizing how fast they were moving, and knowing he didn't want to hurt her, he held her against him, not moving for a moment. Zin appreciated the chance to let her body relax to fit him, but quickly her body needed more, and she started to ride him, taking her fast and deep inside her, her fingers slipping under his shirt.

"Oh god, Yes!" Zin screamed out as Ben gripped her ass tighter, his fingers pressing into her soft flesh. She knew she was going to come soon, but wanted to make the moment last as long as possible. But then Ben moved his hands again, his fingers slipping further under her, massaging behind where he was filling her, letting his finger slip just slightly inside. "Fuck, yes!" she screamed again and bucking harder, this time losing control. Her body tightened around his cock and her fingers scratched deeply into his chest as she let her head fall back, cumming hard. Her reaction pushed Ben over the edge and he joined her in her ecstasy. He held her close to him as his body spasmed. 

As their orgasms calmed, Zin lifted her head from Ben's chest.

"I'm comfortable now," she smiled.

A Little Religion? (part 1)

Emma slid into the back pew, bowing her head. She wasn't highly religious, and rarely ever attended church services. But, whenever something was bringing her down, such as was the case this time, she would slip into the abandoned church for a little quiet and introspection. She'd just left her fiancee, two weeks before the wedding. But it was his fault, she reminded herself, bringing her hand up to the bruise on her cheek.

A noise behind her pulled her from her thoughts, startling her. She turned her head slightly.

"Pastor Mark, I...I'm sorry. I di...didn't know you'd b...be here." Emma turned to grab her purse from the pew, getting ready to rise. Strong hands fell to her shoulders, stopping her.

"Everything ok?"

Emma heard the genuine concern in his voice and shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, everything is ok." She glanced back at him and forced a smile onto her lips.

Mark's finger hooked under her chin just as she was about to look away, bringing her gaze back to him. Moving his hand, he brushed his fingers over the bruised cheek. "This is what you consider ok?"

Tears quickly filled her eyes and she turned her head away from him, grabbing her purse again. "I have to go."

"Please, stay," his hands once again were upon her shoulders, this time massaging softly.

"I..."

"You don't have to explain what happen, or say anything," he assured her. She thought about this for a moment, but the feel of his hands working away her tension, and the peacefulness of the church, made the decision an easy one. Her shoulders relaxed beneath his fingers and she gave a small nod.

His massage grew harder, though still gentle, his strong fingers working the knots from her shoulders and neck, moving down to her upper back. Emma let out a small moan, leaning back into his touch. Had his touch changed? She couldn't help but ask herself this as she felt a tinge of desire shoot through her. But, the way his fingers were caressing over her, she was fairly certain he was feeling the same way. She leaned back more when his touch moved again to her shoulders and let her head lean against his chest.

Mark glided his hands to her upper chest, lightly working on the muscles there. He glanced down at her; she shifted, tilting her head to gaze up at him. He allowed his hands to slide down even further, the tips of his fingers brushing over her nipples, feeling them harden through the light silk fabric. A groan escaped him as he leaned down, claiming her lips with his own.

His kiss was slow and undemanding, his tongue slowly tasting and teasing her lips until they parted; his fingers grazing over her hard nipples again and again. Emma moaned again, this time more needy as she pressed her chest against his touch. He slid one hand to the back of her head, deepening their kiss, his lips and tongue becoming more demanding as his other hand pinched one of her nipples through the shirt. She groaned into his kiss, squirming in the pew.

Mark pulled away from her for a moment and Emma whimpered. He took her hand in his, urging her to stand and move to where he was standing.

"Come here," his voice was a raspy whisper. She answered with a nod, and by following his command. Once she reached the back of the pew, he kissed her hard and without mercy, hurriedly unbuttoning her silk blouse and sliding his hands under the fabric to caress her soft skin. As he moved his lips away from her, she gazed up into his eyes, her lower lip trembling. Watching him, she moved her fingers beneath his shirt, dancing them over his chest, pressing herself close to him.

Just Shut Up

"Aaarrrggh!!!" Sarah threw the empty soda can at the closed door, followed by the remote control, and an empty medicine bottle that had been sitting on the end table.

Scott frustrated her to no end. She understood why he left - understood the frustration he felt - but it still pissed her off.

"What do you expect? We both leave our responsibilities behind and run away?" His last words echoed through her mind. Of course she didn't expect that. Did she?

"Aaaarrgh!" she screamed again, another random object suddenly flying towards the door.

"Ow!" The exclamation made Sarah jump.

"Scott." Embarrassment, anger and disbelief all fought for control within her eyes.

"Correct," came the sarcastic remark. "What did the TV Guide do to you?" he crossed the room, handing her the latest object that she had made fly across the room.

"Um, nothing," she stumbled. "Nothing good on."

"Never is."

"Scott..."

"We already covered that."

Sarah gave a small smile. "Will you please let me finish?"

Scott took another step closer to her, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Just shut up, Sarah." Before she could respond, Scott leaned down, claiming her lips with his own. His kiss was gentle, yet demanding, and she answered by kissing him back with as much demand and determination.

She pulled his lower lip between hers, sucking softly, her body pressing closer to his. She'd wanted this for years - even before she realized exactly what it was she wanted. It had always been him. Yes, she'd tried to disguise it; she'd found others to pass the time. Even married one. That was a mistake. Abusive ass. But Scott? Scott had always been in the back of her mind - was always the one she dreamed of late at night, when she was lonely. Scott was always the one she thought of when she felt the need to pleasure herself. And now here he was, kissing her like she'd wanted for so long.

Scott, his hands still resting on her shoulders, pushed her from him slightly, staring down into her deep passionate eyes. Sarah could see the uncertainty in his gaze, could feel the heat coming from between his legs, could hear the uneven, short breaths he was taking. She hesitated for just a moment before reaching up to press her lips against his again. Her hands slid down his chest until they reached the bottom of his shirt.

Sarah pulled the shirt over his head, then connected their lips again, kissing him deeper as she let her hands wander over his now-bare chest. Her actions quickened both his heart rate and his response, and he found himself quickly unbuttoning her blouse and sliding it off her shoulders. His mouth slipped from hers, allowing himself room to plant small kisses down her neck and over her now bare shoulders.

Sarah trembled, her knees almost giving out on her as his lips found their way to one of her hardened nipples. Scott groaned, the vibration of his action causing Sarah to tremble and push herself against him even harder.

"Shh," Scott soothed, flicking his tongue over her taut nipple. Sarah thrust against him with each flick of the tongue. Scott led her backwards until her legs were against the couch. She looked up at him, started. Scott only smiled as he pushed her back until she was laying down, his lips never leaving her breasts. As he continued swirling his tongue around her nipples, each one in turn, he allowed his hand to slide down her stomach, and slip inside her pajama bottoms. He could feel her heat, and felt himself get even harder.